Blew up over Fleshlight?!?! Sounds like you need a new wife :/ Maybe she would prefer you used the services of a pro? It is not like you are cheating on her.
I can certainly see the cost of the V being an issue. It is basically two or so car payments or 1/4 of a years property tax in many areas. If she were more open minded, saving up getting both the V and a Sybian for her would be an option.